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About Hamilton

Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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After that, I head over to the Kaiapoi River. It’s stunning, man. The water’s glistening, and I’m feeling all philosophical. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in. But then, I see this kid trying to fish. He’s got his line tangled in a tree. Classic! I can’t help but chuckle. I mean, fishing in Kaiapoi? You gotta be prepared for some epic fails.

Sheryl learns to crochet with one hand after stroke